Heard the Heartbeat!

Quick update today!

We HEARD the heartbeat today! Unbelievable!!!! It was amazing and quite a surprise. I had no idea you could hear it this early. But, there it was, beating away at 131 bpm!!!!! It was wonderful! We even got a picture of the sound waves of the beating heart. I’ll post pics later as I’m running out the door. I had a very rough night last night with the m/s (scratch that – all day sickness). I’m trying to figure out what works at keeping it at bay. I’ve gotten lots of suggestions and will try some of those! I’m trying to eat every two hours (small meals) to see if that helps. I don’t feel awesome, but it’s better.  Here are some pics for your viewing pleasure

This first one is our baby at 7 weeks:

This next one is the graphical representation of when we heard the h/b!!! See those sound waves?! That’s what 131 bpm sounds like!

And this is my 7 week belly shot. I’ve got a bit of a pooch going. Mostly bloat and fertility drugs! I’m proud of it nonetheless!

Queasy & Congrats to MJ

Oh boy am I queasy. I actually feel awful. This is good – I know it’s good. If i wasn’t queasy then I’d be worried, but when I feel bad I just want to die! It doesn’t seem to matter what I eat, when I eat, or IF I eat…in fact, eating makes it worse a lot of the time! It’s not a good excuse to not be posting in my blog, I know. I’ve also been extremely tired and sore from the shots and pregnancy. By the end of the day I hurt so much that I can’t move very well! Lovely!

We go tomorrow for our 7 week u/s! I’m excited and nervous as always. I feel so awful though that it must be good! LOL.

And now for the exciting part of my post….drum roll please….

My very close (real life) friend, MJ, is pregnant!!!! She’s due on February 13. So she’s about 12 weeks along. She told me 3 weeks ago, but has obviously known for much longer than that. I was so excited that I cried (a few times) and we just hugged and giggled. This is amazing! For years, we’ve talked about how awesome it would be to be pregnant at the same time and have children at the same time. I never knew it would actually happen! I’m so beyond excited for her and her DH (dear husband). They are going to make fabulous parents! I can’t wait for our children to grow up together. I mean, heck, we already have play dates for our dogs all the time (our dogs are boyfriend/girlfriend). This is just icing on the cake of a beautiful friendship. It’s really a dream come true. And now we have so much new stuff to talk about! I will say that now it’s a little more pressure for this pregnancy to stick b/c I really want to have a baby around the same time as her!!! Maybe this was the reason the other pregnancies didn’t work – maybe I was supposed to be pregnant at the same time as her…? She did joke the other day that “heck, if I had known all it would take for Lindsey to stay pregnant was me getting pregnant, I would have done it a year ago!” LOL. Well, I’m  happy about it now and can’t wait to share this journey. I love you, MJ!!!!!

We Have a Heartbeat!!!

Woohoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m in shock right now. Really. I honestly can’t believe we have passed this milestone! I am 6 weeks today (measuring 6w1d on the u/s). My EDD (estimated due date) is either March 17 (according to u/s) or March 18 (according to the calendar). I’m beyond happy right now. After the last three pregnancies, which were all lost before a heartbeat was seen, I wasn’t sure I could even get to this point. But, it looks like the intralipids are working!!! The baby’s heartbeat was going about 130 bpm (roughly). The nurse said it’s too hard to count at this point, but by looking she could tell it’s about 130. O.M.G. The nurse (I love my nurse) gave me pics again today. They are awful though! The printer isn’t working very well on that paticular u/s machine. She said I could get a different machine next time! But, here you go! My Peanut is .44cm big (last week the sac was .46cm – not sure how big the sac is this time – they don’t measure it once they can measure the baby!). the baby is at the top of the dark circle.

Seriously. I might actually have a baby?! Crazy.

Intralipid Therapy: Check

Just 36 more hours before my next u/s!!!! That’s totally what I’m focused on right now!

Had my second IV Intralipid therapy treatment today. My friend, K, was super kind to come and sit with me so I wouldn’t have to be alone. It went fine – in and out in under two hours. I tollerated it just fine with no reactions. I’m having a few side effects now that I had before – achy and very tired. I can take it though. I also learned that this was my last treatment for this pregnancy. So hopefully, my last treatment for a few years until I decide to try for #2!

The nurse was great. She freaked me out a little bit by being very upfront that something can still go wrong. She said we are doing everything we possibly can be doing which is a curse and a blessing. A blessing b/c we are trying to help this baby, but a curse b/c I feel like we are running out of options. Options give me hope. Lack of options scares me. She said even if we see a h/b (heartbeat), we can still have a m/c. I know all of this, but it’s still hard to hear.

I just need to keep thanking God for everyday He gives me with this little peanut. And I am so thankful. I’m thankful that today I have made it to 5 weeks and 5 days with this little one. And tomorrow when I wake up, I will have made it to 5 weeks and 6 days. Every day is a blessing. I just hope this little one can stick around for a LOT longer than the others.

Time to go back and lay down! Love to all!

Going Up, Up, UP!

Had ANOTHER beta this morning. The result was 4,766! I have to admit I was a bit surprised as my symptoms were not as severe yesterday and today. Of course, I feared the worst. But, everything is great!

And to make it EVEN better, I got to spend it with a RL/SK friend of mine who was visiting. We were shopping at Babies-R-Us for her twins (well, mostly getting ideas for the registry) when I got my results. I was so nervous (of course) and when the nurse told me the number and I repeated it aloud, it was so awesome having her there. We hugged right there in the rocking chair section and then sat in the gliders for 20 minutes just talking and hanging out. It was a GREAT day!

I go tomorrow for my second IV intralipid therapy. Then Thursday, we get to see the little bean again. How many peanuts will we have this week?! I’m still thinking one. hmm….

One Little Bean

Again, I was worried for nothing. The nurse last night made it sound like this stitch was a major problem that had to be delt with STAT (she didn’t say STAT – I added that for effect). But, when I got there today, the doctor said he didn’t want to take it out and it was no big deal. So, I’m back to liking my nurse

Anyway, I asked for an u/s because I was so nervous that now all of the sudden something was wrong. And the nurse happily obliged. We saw ONE beautiful, healthy, perfect bean!!! The nurse said it looks perfect – measuring perfect and all is well. And my beta number…wait for it….1,860!!! Holy Canoli!!!! Now, I must tell you that I started taking Hcg supplements yesterday so that will help make it higher, but it’s still WAY high. I wasn’t expecting it to be that high! So, all is once again well.

I’m home today trying to rest and bring my blood pressure back to normal (it was a bit high this morning). Here are my pictures from this morning. My bean doesn’t look much like anything, but it’s the most beautiful circle I’ve ever seen

 

The dark black circle on the lower left is my baby! It’s just the gestational sac at this point. She said she thinks the yolk sac is in the lower left part of the circle, but it was a bit too early to see it.

This next one is where she measured the bean: 4.6mm! What a little peanut!

I also had my first bout of m/s (morning sickness) this morning! I didn’t actually toss my cookies (which is funny b/c cookies are one of the things that I can actually eat – only milanos though), but I ran to the bathroom and was dry heaving. It was wonderful! my boobs still hurt and I continue to press on them throughout the day to make sure they still hurt. Weird, I know.

So, I’m off to get lunch (olives….yum-o!), get my progesterone shot, walk the dog to walk off the pain of the progesterone shot, and then REST.

Next on the docket for my little bean is another blood test on Monday….just to be on the safe side…yes, I am neurotic.

As always, I so appreciate everyone’s kind words, support, prayers, and friendship. Especially when I’m overreacting and being silly. I’ve so lost my sense of innocence about pregnancy that I worry constantly. That will continue…oh, probably until forever! Please keep the prayers and good thoughts coming. I pray that God will allow this little one to stay with us. I hope He knows how much this baby is loved and how prepared we are to welcome this child into our lives. This child is so loved and wanted. Please, please, please let this work.

Is it weird that I’m already talking to the baby (and the u/s pic) telling it how much I love it!? Maybe if it knows how loved it is, I can keep it!

Scared

Just when I think all is well…

I started having some pain in my cervix today. Not horrible, but enough to scare me. So I decided to call my RE’s office just to be reassured that all is well. Not so much.

The on-call nurse (I called after hours) told me I need to come in tomorrow morning. I told her I was having pain and that I still have the stitch in from my lap/hysteroscopy on June 9. She said “ohhh, that stitch needs to come out. I hope the skin didn’t grow around it.” Now, let me back up a moment. When I went in for my IUI 3 weeks ago, the nurse who put the speculum in said “oh, you have a stitch!” (said in a cheery, not-a-big-deal voice). Okay, so I have a stitch – no biggie. Now, I’m 5 weeks pregnant with, what looks like a potentially viable baby and the stitch has to come out? What the heck kind of timeline is this? The nurse also doesn’t think the pain is from the stitch – she thinks that’s normal pain. Normal pain? In my cervix? At 5 weeks? She said taking out the stitch will NOT cause a m/c, but they are going to do repeat b/w just to make sure I’m still okay (even though I just had it today).

The slight silver lining in this? I may just get my first u/s tomorrow – she said I probably could. But, she said we may not be able to see anything.

As if I wasn’t worried enough…

Beta #3 – The good news keeps coming!

798!!!!! I’m so excited  I just had to blurt it out!

Last night and this morning I was so nervous. I don’t know why. I just freaked myself out. I thought today was going to go badly. I have no real reason to feel that way. I still feel very pregnant. As my acupuncturist said, this anxiety is not based on anything real, it’s all in my head. And he was right. I need to chill out and let this little bean(s) grow, grow, grow!

I go back Monday morning for my 4th beta draw. Excessive, I know! My u/s is scheduled for 9:00AM on Thursday, July 23. 8 days away. OMG.

(switching topics…sort of!)

I saw a falling star last night. Could it be that God is trying to tell me that everything is going to be okay? I didn’t ask for a sign, it just showed up. It was really pretty and neat to see. I didn’t make a wish right then and there, but I keep thinking about it. I hope it’s a good sign and that I will get to keep this baby. Please, please, please.

For my Friend

Today’s post is dedicated to my friend, S, who is starting the next phase of her IVF journey today.

I wish you the best luck in the world, S. And I pray that this leads you to an amazing sticky BFP. You will make a wonderful mommy and it’s going to happen for you soon. Keep smiling and stay positive.

XOXO – Lindsey

Beta #2 – More than doubled!

In 48 hours, my beta level went from 64 to 146.1!!!!! Really, it’s only supposed to double every 72 hours and mine is more than doubling in less time!!!!! wowzers!!!!

I’m feeling so blessed and excited right now. I’m going to rest this weekend and take it easy. I want this baby to stick!!!!!

I truly appreciate everyone’s comments and support. This baby is already so loved. I try to individually thank everyone for their comments, but if I miss you, please know that I am grateful for everyone’s friendship, comments, and support. xoxo